"Keep Your Goals to Yourself" 
um... 
no.


18/100


According to Derek Sivers it is a mistake to tell someone your goals, "Derek Sivers: Keep Your Goals to Yourself". While I can see his point (essentially he is saying that if you tell someone your plans, you enjoy the 'rush' of good feelings you receive and are more likely not to actually do the work to accomplish your desired goal) I'm not sure I fully agree.


In some ways, I get what Sivers is saying. Someone who plasters goals all over facebook, a blog and tells all his (or her) friends, ends up garnering himself lots of support. He is energized and that 'boost' of good energy then means he doesn't have to actually DO the work. After all, the ability to remember that sort of thing on facebook is brief and even if he doesn't do P90X every single day like he said was going to happen, in 24 hours everyone's facebook page will fill up with a truckload of new status messages and no one will really remember it was put there in the first place.

When I was working at a new age store in the early 90s, I remember attending a workshop where the instructor talked about how 'words have energy' and when you share your ideas, that 'magic' disperses and each person you tell makes the likelihood of the thing you are trying to manifest less and less.


Well... I think there is some truth to keeping something to yourself, but I also see the benefits of sharing...


The keeping it to yourself part for me is that I know I have at least a thousand times told people I was 'going to lose weight'. Or "OMGTHISISTHEMOSTAMAZING/fillintheblank/EVER" (fill in the blank with words like: religion, diet, book, theory, movie, political affiliation, etc.) which lasted a short while before I sucked the marrow out of the experience and moved on. With the thousand different diets or exercise plans or whatever weight loss trick I'd tried, I eventually chaffed under the restrictions, rebelled and ultimately gave up. I ended up looking and feeling flaky and unreliable.


Still, I think it is human nature to want to share experiences - it is a way to not feel so alone. It's understandable and I suspect part of the drive to 'belong'. I can almost tell a new convert to something (be it politics, religion, sport, god, exercise machine, etc.) because that person is fanatical about their 'new' discovery. Oh wow, (fill in the blank here) is the most amazing (fill in the blank again) ever! It has truly changed my life! You should really try it! But sharing and trying to entice others to 'join up' or 'see it my way' is a trait I have worked hard to grow out of... to me it is a sign of being unhealthy in that it is a way to force community instead of organically letting it grow.


The thing is, usually before the hype was over I had already headed off on my next journey. I didn't stick with things long enough for the new polish to get scuffed. 'So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, goodbye'  I was already gone.


When I look at my life however, I can see that I have also had incredible staying power. My faith, while manifesting in many forms has been a staple in my world for my entire life. My true friends, the ones who are supportive, generous, loving, kind and appreciative have remained in my life through hard work and dedication; some as many as 41 years (yes, that's you, Margaret). I think it is precisely because I shared my hopes and dreams and fears that so many people have stayed in my life so long.


I don't see my blog about the next 100 days of living a healthy life as dispersing my energy. I'm not focusing on how much weight I am losing, how fast or slow I am losing it or even if I am losing it. There is no rigid diet I am following, nor am I trying to convince any of you that I know the ONE RIGHT WAY to being healthy.


I am looking at my life and sharing what I find. The act of putting it out there means it is no longer shadowed in the corner of my deepest self whispering disparaging remarks. Naming what I find also has power; giving a name to some of the fears, anxieties and stumbles is more than just meaningful, it is a way to move forward making healthier choices in my life. It helps make room for the hopes, dreams and goals I am creating.


In the end, I write this blog for me... I am amazed, happy and at times even overwhelmed at the kindness and support I have received for writing it. I would still write out my journey, even if no one followed... but truly? Knowing you do? Helps me stay accountable, reminds me 'oh I have to write my blog today', and gives me a sense of community that keeping this to myself would never have afforded me.


SO... thank you! All of you who lurk, follow, read through my tomes and tell me at work, in emails, in the comment section that you like, agree with, disagree with, cry with, laugh with, laugh AT my posts means a great deal. Having a community that supports and appreciates me is incredible. I just wanted you all to know? I support and appreciate you, too.


Peace,


MaryKate